What is Therapy? A short story.
When I moved into my house, I hated the bedroom ceiling lights.
They sat off-centre, in front of the windows instead of in the middle of the room, and once I noticed it, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I assumed it was a mistake or done for ease. It felt distracting, frustrating, and wrong, so I asked an electrician to quote to move them.
When he saw them, he explained that the positioning was actually intentional, a design feature of the time known as “modesty lighting”. He told me the lights were placed that way so that when someone got dressed at night, their silhouette wouldn’t cast onto the curtains.
Once I understood the reason behind their position, my relationship to the lights changed. What I had assumed was wrong suddenly made sense within a wider context and I actually became fond of the story, history, and reason behind them.
Later, I realised this experience reminded me of therapy.
Often, things about ourselves or others can feel confusing, frustrating, or somehow wrong. However, when we take time to uncover why we think and react the way we do, our behaviour, patterns, or ways of coping make more sense. This can self-awareness can allow us to be more compassionate and curious.
That doesn’t mean things have to stay the same, but it can create space for a more informed choice. I could still choose to move the ceiling lights, but that choice came from understanding rather than frustration.
Sometimes the things we struggle with are not signs that something is wrong with us, but clues that there is something important to understand. Therapy can provide a space to explore these experiences, make sense of what has shaped us, and consider new ways forward.
If this resonates with you and you would like to explore therapy, please do get in contact.